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Today's Honoured Guestmy peeps The Boys
RaJ
Tayster
factory_peasant
Surfer Mitch
Scared Bunny
Jake
Hof
my peeps The Girls
Sass
Pajiba
Tristan Roy
Radiohead blue eyes,
crooked teeth,
intellectual,
goofball,
slacker,
socialist.
Stuff and Nonsense
You LOVE Me THIS much
Steff
Crystal
Lyvvie
Cate
OEN
--spared--
Rachel
bitchy
Dlisted
Janet Charlton
MPH
Go Fug Yourself
the pretty pictures
Owen Billcliffe
No Traces
Sam Javanrouh
the professionals blog
Matthew Good
Margaret Cho
Rick Mercer
Tony Pierce
Whil Wheaton
Waiter
shameless self promotion
About Me
My influence
[1338.4]
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What Came Before
2005.05
2005.06
2005.07
2005.08
2005.09
2005.10
2005.11
2005.12
2006.01
2006.02
2006.03
2006.04
2006.05
2006.06
2006.07
2006.08
2006.09
2006.10
2006.11
2006.12
2007.01
2007.02
2007.03
2007.04
2007.05
2007.06
2007.07
2007.08
2007.09
2007.10
2007.11
2007.12
2008.01
2008.02
2008.03
2008.04
2008.05
2008.07
2008.09
2008.10
2009.01
2010.01
2010.03
2010.05
i just needed someone to talk to you were far too busy with yourself
:
I hate moving. All the packing and sorting and throwing stuff out. I've been bruising my hands carrying stuff around, breaking my nails and generally being surprised how easy it is to get rid of years of collective crap. I took all my old journals, the bitchy whiny shit I've been hauling around because it seemed so important to remember what happened and I shredded it all. It was all the same, really. Years and years of blithering. Not one awesome thing to say, nothing profound. I've given all that up so I got rid of that too. Who did what to who, what I perceived to be going on. Who gives a shit? Not me anymore.
Of course I've still got tonnes of stuff to lug around. I have reams of poetry no one reads. I'll eventually get it all online but lately I've not had the time or taste for it. Half my family isn't talking to me. My sister went through her bi-annual I hate you's by picking a fight on the phone with me, hanging up when I refused to answer her then she emailed me with the intent of ruining my birthday - to tell me how I ruined her life and how I hate her. I've heard this all before and I just don't care. She says she's happy and has moved on, I call Bullshit and she stops talking to me. Oh well. This is nothing new.
The new stuff is way more freaky. Aside from having 3 dinners for my birthday I actually got a present. I lost my hat during one dinner, but I found it a few days later so it's really all good. The really FREAKY part is that apparently my dead ex husband (did I mentioned I laughed maniacally about that?) didn't take me off his RSP and I have inherited it. I don't know if it was an oversight, that he figured that since he drained the other one if there was anything to transfer it would go to a new account or if it was on purpose regardless of the account, or he just didn't think of it and never took my name off the account. Either way I now have more savings locked in then before. I now need to get that stuff updated. I need to get there and fix up my name and stuff. We aren't married and he's dead, I sure don't want to keep his name now. Not that I did before, but I need a push because I'm kinda lazy about these little details. This just really shows you why you shouldn't be.
I've been making changes, big and small. I chopped all my hair off and now have a funky shag which I'm loving. I'm committed to losing even more weight in the new year, even without a gym membership I've been doing ok so I now have access to 11 flights of stairs I can take and I'm looking into aquafit classes, I love to swim so why not?
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 9:44 PM
13 January 2008
your silver grin, sticking it in
:
There is always someone who is going to resent what you have. People are jealous creatures. Whether they resent your status, fame, wealth, brains, beauty or material goods someone out there thinks they are better and more deserving then you of everything. There are names for these people. Climbers, reachers, wannabes. What ever you call them, you know at least one and you know someone who they have targeted as the object of their derision.
Of course it's possible that they have more then one target, or that everyone they talk to they then turn around and talk about with something negative to say. There are people who are just negative about everything and everyone and then there are the trash talkers, the ones who never have anything good to say about anyone because it makes them feel better. Let's face it, unless we don't speak and are socially retarded, we've all engaged in trash talking at some point - about people we do and don't know. This is also known as gossip.
There are people out there who will be nice to you your whole life, just to talk about you behind your back. They will deny it to your face too. Then there are those that will tell you to your face what they say behind your back, which is nice because it cuts the lying - but most people won't believe it anyways.
There will always be people in your life who want to know about you so they can take that information and use it to 'inform' others in a gossipy fashion, highlighting and or totally distorting what ever you may have actually said. People talk, and people love to talk about other people. There are entire businesses built upon that idea. Tabloids anyone? The simple fact is that the only way no one will ever say anything about you to anyone is if they A don't know you or B are dead, otherwise, at some point, they're going to say something. It may not be nice, it may not be something you want to hear - but if you're lucky they will be your friend and telling you whatever they may to someone else. Otherwise, well you've just risen in the ranks of the tabloids.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 10:21 PM
05 January 2008
wontcha play another somebody done somebody wrong song
:
It doesn't matter who did what to who. What lie was told, what agreement was forgotten in malice or self centered-ness. What matters is this is a new year. What matters is I know what I want and what I won't accept. No one else needs to know what will happen, I'm the only one that matters.
Some may say I am a little late to adopting the mantra of Generation Y - ME ME ME it's all about ME, but I'm Gen X so what does it matter? People may rail at that assessment, however I know a great many Gen Y-ers and it's all the same, self centered talky talk about what they want and and deserve. Being vocal about that is never a bad thing, being too reticent to go get it is. I am neither. I don't spend a lot of time talking about what I want I just go get it. This can be a good and bad thing, however it is mostly how I manage to succeed in my plans so I'll rate it as an over all positive.
In the spirit of being positive I'm going to endeavour to enlighten this blog. I will also work to getting back to the poetry, however that may continue to suffer until my living arrangements are sorted out finally. It seems I'm endlessly cleaning house as I sort through this and that trying to figure out what needs to be moved and what I can let go of. Having no storage at this place will be a problem, but hopefully something I can work around until I can get a roomier place or a storage locker.
In the mean time I will need to figure out the logistics of getting the dog and the plant to the new place, so some movers will take plants but I don't know one that will move a pet for you. I'll have to see what happens with what people have told me they will do and go from there. In the mean time I continue to pack and sort and cull and move things to the living room. I'll have to book the mover soon, yet I don't know if I can get in before the 1st. I'm hoping this will be known soon.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 3:13 AM
01 January 2008
does that make me too normal for you
:
Happy New Year.
17 days until my birthday, 30 days until I can officially move out of the house and into my 500+ square feet of living alone goodness. It's nice to know I won't have anyone to deal with but me and the psycho dog, however I worry that the psycho dog will not handle the change well and will bark constantly when I'm not home and get me in trouble with the land lord. It's a small concern but one I am willing to live with.
I am probably going to be throwing out the coffee table and entertainment unit that I have, because the table is broke down and the entertainment unit is too big for my wee 20 inch tv. I need something higher off the ground and, well, something I like. There is one at Canadian Tire on sale that I'm coveting, and I may buy it even if it is not still on sale when I get paid because I want something I LIKE. I'm not that hard to please, I'm just not that into the one I have is all. We'll see what happens.
I have to call and get some more information about the place. Like what is my buzzer number and post box going to be and if I can move in a day or 2 earlier to get a small (if they will give me one at all in the "off season") moving discount. I have to get on getting my mail forwarded and my services changed. I have to cancel the Rogers internet service as it's crap and too expensive. Hopefully that doesn't lead them to turning off my phone service, because even thought the line is all crackly the basic long distance is cheap. This should be an interesting start the year. Wish me well.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 1:13 AM
