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What Came Before

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From the ghost land of the easy life.

03 August 2006

now there's a key where my wonderful mouth used to be :
I just realized you can't get to my archives.  Oops.  I don't know if anyone has been actively looking for them but still, it makes everything a lot easier to figure out if you can look back to previous references.  You need to see the previous instances of spotty insanity, it's only fair that you can see if I'm always like this.  And yea, I am.
Kid E moved out ant Kid N and J steam cleaned the carpet in his room and then closed the windows.  It was the cooles night in a long time  and his window was closed and the carpet was wet and there was not a single fan on.  It made no sense to me.  I didn't do anything about it, like open the window because I'm keeping my head down in the severly tense household that is currently acting like nothing was ever said to me about getting a bigger room.
I think I'm going to have to take the smaller room.  I think so because of the whole payage of rent and the avoidance of talk thing going on.  I can't get Kid N to answer my questions and Kid E, before he left filled me in on his take on things which was -> Kid M is selfish and always gets what he wants so he'll probably worm his way back in.  Apparently everyone knows way more than I do.  It doesn't surprise me much, I'm still the outsider less cool older chick.  Plus I'm like vampire girl living my life mostly in the after 10 am hours, when they all are living a mostly starts at 8 am thing.  We so don't have a lot of time or opportunity to make friends.  I don't make many friends living the massively fluctuating all work and no play life I am.  Fact.
Of course the most appealing thing I have found is a maid service job.  Pays better has steady hours and I don't know if I want to be a maid.  I mean really.  I'm not a supre clean freak or anything, however it is a job I can do with set hours and days off.  Thing is the pay isn't guaranteed and the hours aren't either.  I don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but I'm pretty sure this isn't it and the sad sad fact is I have no options except laterally moving to another crap job I can do competently but not truly enjoy.  I shoulda been a fry cook.  I used to love waitressing and working in the kitchens.  Maybe I coulda been a chef, but I think I'm late to all those parties now.  Too old and black listed from further education unless I marry rich or win the lottery.
I get to be officially divorced in the middle of August.  18 August I am free nd cler and certified not married to the EX.  Funnily enough that is a day after the Super Ex starts in town and I kinda want to go.  I don't know how I'm going to afford it to go and play all the games cuz I'm a sucker always trying to win a bigger and better toy. 
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 4:17 PM

MenTal fUrbAll