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From the ghost land of the easy life.

24 December 2005

for they are only fleeting things my elusive dreams :
I saw my doctor today. He told me there is 'definitely' there, in my foot. I get to go have 'it' exposed to the world with an ultra sound, sometime. They're gonna call me and tell me when. Hopefully I get enough notice that I don't have to skip work to go get it done.

Most of the house is gone. Only Kid M remains. He leaves tomorrow sometime. He may or may not do the dishes before he goes. He did, however, allow me to use his Xbox today. Mind you he's taking it with him tomorrow so fat lot of good that does. I'm fixing to be real bored as I can't get the DVD player in the front room to work and I'm not dying to spend the entire holiday locked in my room when I have the house to myself. It just seems Wrong!

Hope y'all are having a good Christkwanzukkah. It's my ne fave season, as far as I have enjoyed it the past 18 years. Actually I've been dreading it to the point I've gotten a bad stomach over the last few days. I'm just letting everything drag me down. Mostly because I'm WAY TIRED of the whole holiday, poor thing, sad looks, confused people thing. I'm not the poster child for bad family values. I don't want your pity. If you can't include me in your holidays then don't ask and act all concerned like I'm moving up the totally pathetic charts straight for number one. I'll be fine and all your false concern and BS sympathy make me want to KICK YOUR ASS!!!!!

I have a wee bit of holiday rage going on. Mostly because of the traffic today. I left 1.5 hours early for my appointment to see my doc, and I was late because people are stupid. See, we had a lightly snowy day. So naturally everyone who could drive, got in a car and headed out into the street and got an instant snow lobotomy and forgot HOW TO DRIVE. I've managed to not actually shove any of the thousands of people that go and get into the way of walking while I'm downtown or at the mall, all month. You've seen them. They hustle up in front of you then slow right down or STOP. Like they didn't actually see you as they RAN past you to become your roadblock for the half hour. I don't understand it but I have developed an uncontrolable muttering problem where I just weave my way through saying "fucking people get the fuck out of my way excuse the fuck out of you doesn't anyone say excuse me anyfucking more" like some magical charm that will protect me from whatever it is that they sre afflicted with.

Let's face it you don't go out in the highway and just stop in the middle of traffic without something bad happening. It should make sense that in walking traffic, coming to a complete standstill without moving off to the side will result in someone either hitting you or getting mad. I generally have a low level mall rage going at the busy times of year but people are being extra dumb or I'm extra noticing it, because this year I'm so having an ISSUE with the random insanity that is being a pedestrian at the holiday times.

Yea ok I guess it's a holiday rant. I won't appologise because I doubt there's anyone reading this and I'll post more and this will be forgot after all, it is being pointed out to me all day everyday that - everyone has something to do for the holidays BUT ME. I do get a reprieve for New Years, the Kids will be back, N&J anyways (Kid M wanted me to know he can't decide if we're good enough to do New Years with since he got invited to an embassy) so I can have people to say Merry New Years to. I hope no one wants to sing Auld Lang Syne. I don't know the words.

Anyways I'm hoping there's no percipitation tomorrow because I want my bed. Carpool guy won't go get it and bring it here if there's even a drop of rain or one snowflake falling, so it better all be on the ground by the time he crawls outta bed tomorrow. My BFFC Lins is supposed to be in town soon too. It's all okayed through the Kids that she crash here while in town but I have no idea if she got my message or not and I don't know if she will come stay here or if she's trapped in a booked and paid for hotel room. I'm so outta the loop I don't even know what day it is today. I forgot my own name briefly too today, so it's not improving my less then fuzzy mood.

Anyhoo I have to go shut off the heat in the living room. It's strictly forboden to leave it on all the time. Infact I think it's perferred that we never turn the heat on outside of our own rooms. We're all supposed to be energy misers. Which has advantages and disadvantages. It can actually hurt, and maybe I'll save that story for drunk blogging on New Years. OK?? Have a good one. Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 12:43 AM

MenTal fUrbAll