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From the ghost land of the easy life.

24 August 2005

you say it can't be done you'd rather die of fun get out of the way :
I made it through the day, for about 4 hours I was pretty convinced I was having a heart attack. Ok, maybe a stoke - but something serious. I was numb in my left arm and my head was all pins and needles and I had a stabbing pain under my left lower rib. It freaked me out a bit but I was fine otherwise. I did and didn't want to go to the hospital. I didn't go. I felt better after a couple hours, but I got a headache. Apparently this headache decided it needed to freak me out to be taken seriously. I'm way over tired so every little thing is just AWESOME to me today. I was wound so tight I was on the verge of tears all day. I may just be having a nervous breakdown. I'm not sure if that feels any different from an aneurysm, but someone out there might so let me know.

I got home and a job I applied for last night had called this morning to ask me to come for testing. They are in Ottawa, I have no car. What was I thinking? Well mostly that a job that can stress me to the point I'm thinking I'm suffering a stroke while doing it is so worth quitting - so best be getting something way better to do. Yea that's it. Now of course I'm thinking what a hassle all this going to Ottawa will be if I don't get/take the job. Hopefully I can arrange a ride. I can dream :)

If I don't work something out I will quit and go on welfare until the next employment horror comes along. I'm all for being a totally over educated burger flipper but I have lost all ability to cope with this kind of stress. It's not that I can't handle stress, I can. I am the one to have around in a situation. I know what to do and I do it loudly, but I do it. I just can't take the lies and bullshit. I wasn't hired to do telemarketing I was hired to inbound tech support. My problem?

I have a contract that says I have agreed to "...perform each of the duties of the Tele-Service Representative as set forth herein and as established by {job} and such further duties assigned from time to time ..." Funnily enough the duties outlined herein are non-existant. The contract doesn't even refer to an internal website or document to view prescribed duties, unless they are included and assumed to be part of the company policies. They are the only things referred to directly with an internal website address. The remainder of the contract is rhe standrad don't tell our secrets, don't try to work for our employers and (funnily enough) don't work anywhere elese. It also says we are a 24/7 operation, which we are not and never have been. Someone went to the labour board about being forced to work holidays - which they can't do unles we are 24/7, and now the Job has to ask if we want to work holidays, uh no we don't f-you very much say most.

My contract does not specify at all, what I was told I would be doing when I was hired. Because of that my employer can say I knew I'd be asked to telemarket. Because of that I can't quit and get unemployment because I can't prove my duties were greatly and unreasonably changed. Because I hate my job so much right now I'm wondering if there's a market for an overeducated prozzie in the area. Only slightly joking here, at least I'd be doing something I like...

I digress. I am desperate to get away from this job. And lovely place that it is, it doesn't give references. So I can pretty much say whatever I want about the palce. The will neither confirm nor deny it. Wonderful really. Someone told me I could get a high paying job in a starch factory, I just need to move 2 small towns closer to Quebec for that. Or find a car pool. I could also just go work for Hershey, the pay well and are close enough I could get there on the bus. Oh yea, can you smell that smell? It's me, the desperation to get away from THIS job. They don't make a Secret strong enough for that.

Keep Blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 6:15 PM

MenTal fUrbAll