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Today's Honoured Guestmy peeps The Boys
RaJ
Tayster
factory_peasant
Surfer Mitch
Scared Bunny
Jake
Hof
my peeps The Girls
Sass
Pajiba
Tristan Roy
Radiohead blue eyes,
crooked teeth,
intellectual,
goofball,
slacker,
socialist.
Stuff and Nonsense
You LOVE Me THIS much
Steff
Crystal
Lyvvie
Cate
OEN
--spared--
Rachel
bitchy
Dlisted
Janet Charlton
MPH
Go Fug Yourself
the pretty pictures
Owen Billcliffe
No Traces
Sam Javanrouh
the professionals blog
Matthew Good
Margaret Cho
Rick Mercer
Tony Pierce
Whil Wheaton
Waiter
shameless self promotion
About Me
My influence
[1338.4]
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What Came Before
2005.05
2005.06
2005.07
2005.08
2005.09
2005.10
2005.11
2005.12
2006.01
2006.02
2006.03
2006.04
2006.05
2006.06
2006.07
2006.08
2006.09
2006.10
2006.11
2006.12
2007.01
2007.02
2007.03
2007.04
2007.05
2007.06
2007.07
2007.08
2007.09
2007.10
2007.11
2007.12
2008.01
2008.02
2008.03
2008.04
2008.05
2008.07
2008.09
2008.10
2009.01
2010.01
2010.03
2010.05
just imagine you'd come through this door
:
It's hard to blog when the main focus of all you life is, well, nothing. I got all the time off sorted out for my foot surgery. I'm kind excited and also immensely grossed out by the idea of having my foot cut open. It'll be nice to have my foot back to something resembling normal. At least after the incision heals and all that.
To astound and frighten you I'm going to tell you about the lame and oh so weir dreams I had last night. Because I watched Big Brother before sleeping, and am fairly outraged at the total lack backstabbing and the lameness of simpering herd doing everything the same way. Yea - it's not much of a show of plotting and scheming as a show of figuring out who they're going to glom onto and vote with this week - because let's face it. We don't see these people talking or strategising or anything really - yet they all psychically vote unitedly to get the key person out. I mean really, not even one vote off this week to make the people wonder. Where's the mind fuck that's supposed to be Big Brother. Anyways, top all that fast forwarding disappointment with a dream about the lamest cd shop where Janelle and James are trying to save Kaysar from being eaten alive by rabid chicken George fans, Why? Because chicken George has a cd out and no one in the entire store can find it. I'm weird. And they're getting dead.
Add to that dreaming about genetically engineering chocolate, chicken and steak together into one weird looking, chocolate coloured KFC-esque snack food. Of course it was dark chocolate so it's good for you and has the iron of red meat and lots of protein and is so good for you. I so don't know where that one came from. Maybe I was really hungry in my dreams? The weather outside is pretty disgusting and all the sweating from going to work then coming back here and all the drastic temperature changes is so no fun. I am however going a little wacky form the bouncy shift syndrome. I really kind of got used to it being a certain way, a certain set of hours, now I'm yo-yoing all over the afternoon. It's kinda fucking with me.
I finally made money off of one of my other rings. I'm seriously thinking of getting the other one back and just keeping it. I was thinking of getting the one that just sold back, I'm not as attached to the remaining one. I am glad it all wen t already. It's going to make partying like I want to before the surgery happen after all. I asked Kid M today to pick me up, he's going to think about it. Things are rolling along and turning out ok. I got my new glasses and 1 person noticed. It's nice. At least one person pays attention to me. He he, I take what i can get :)
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 1:20 PM
25 July 2006
dreamed a little dream made my own pretty hate machine
:
Been trying to fight off a summer head cold. Some idiots at work have been doing their best to infect everyone and their brother with it. I had a fiesta fabulous do nothing bonus two days off. Managed that by the skin of my teeth and the desperation of someone who wanted to go casinoing in Niagara Falls. I've been away and not posting, mostly because between the weird hours and the working and the game playing (pc games) and movie watching my brain has been kept in the little thinking category for a while. I'm kinda stuck in the current house war of wills, where in I get to be monkey in the middle for power plays and head games. None of it has anything to do with me, yet both sides want me to know what is going on, in detail.
Aside from that I had a scrabbulous time going to the OBGYN. Apparently Centrepointe Drive is situated in one of thos citty planninf bubbles that includes lots of scenery and access for bikes and pedestrains. I'm sure locals know exactly where to find everything there. However, people that never have any reasont to go there will be lost withing seconds due to the total lack of signs telling you anything about the street you are on, or even the number of the building you are near. I was late and pissed, but was still seen quickly. Goody. I also got the STD panel done, because last flung wasn't someone I trust to tell me anything important.
I'm kinda looking forward to getting my new room, though currently I am having an issue deciding which room I want and which one I need. As most people I want the biggest one, as someone soon to be in touch with her deepest inner scrooge, I need the one that saves me the most money. If I was dead set on that I'd stay here but I know I am needing more space and each room increases that by degrees.
So onto the gushing. I insist you see Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. It is hillarious. I LOVE it. I haven't laughed that hard at a movie in a long time. It was part of a 4 pack I got the other day. I got Failure to Launch (crap), Hoodwinked (cute and fun) and Night Watch. I have to reserve judgement on Night Watch because I am still processing it. I'm pretty sure I liked it. I kinda liked the Devil Wears Prada, which I saw in the theatres. If I had to pick from the trifecta of chick flicks I've seen lately (Failure to Launch, The Devil Wears Prada and The Family Stone) I'm not sure I can pick any of them as a particular favourite. I am pissed though, because I lent my DVD Return to Me to my married friends and now it's missing and they're all like we never had it. But => they did. They had that and While You Were Sleeping so I'm now wanting that back like NOW. I'm kinda a big fan of Return to Me, just like I'm a staunch supporter of Prelude to a Kiss, even French Kiss but not many other Meg Ryan movies. I was way worn out on her before Sleepless in Seattle. It was When Harry Met Sally that did me in. I did like that movie, but I don't care for it now.
I have plans to see my Supre Ex Girlfriend and Pirates of the Carribean at some point. They are on my list. My list, these days, is short. I missed A Scanner Darkly at the ByTowne so I have to hope it comes to the Mayfair or St Laurent. Also on my list is getting my new glasses and getting the dates for my surgery actually off. My teamleads are collaborating on doing nothing and blowing me off. With the huge amounts of how everone hates that place => I'm so not finding the fun in working these days. I know I'm just busy busy over thinking things I don't know for certain and can't arguably predict. I wish I could, but you know what they say. If wishes were horses beggars would ride. I'm sure I'll know all I need to soone enough and be whining about something else sooneroonies.
In the mean time I'll wait for How I Met Your Mother to be on DVD, and wish the BB& players would stop being wussies and actually make a move, take a stand and play the frigging game. It's so boring I'm kind of not wanting to even watch. I'm almost talking my slef aout of watching Canadian Idol too because of the same thing. The singers are getting lamer and the critiques are all padded and lame. Seriously, when they should be saying you didn't do a good job they are just going 'shrug' you tried. LAME? Oh yea. I think Dilana may be the next Rockstar, unless maybe Magni can pull it off. The rest are kind of less than stellar and I can't see them fronting a possibly heavy metal band. Zayra has a kinda Bjork quality to her voice, but she's the only other one who has done something that made me really take notice. I guess we'll see.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 5:20 PM
20 July 2006
there's no way you can be who you sayyou are
:
I'm on day 7 of 7. Yeeha. It's been ok, if not down right bearable. Aside from accidentally leaving my tv on and it blaring CTV all night and disturbing Kid E, who was too stupid to figure out I wasn't home and too lazy to turn the tv off. Apparently he told my landlords I was keeping him awake. Hasn't said shit to me, but then again he's not much of the straight up kinda guy. Infact they very much aren't here, my male roommates are all hosers of the spineless, egotistical variety.
On a funny note a self involved guy at work thought I was saying I was interested in him. He was making a crack about listening to people and I said I have a good interest in it and he got all red and said he didn't think he heard me right. SO I explained I have a little interest in listening to other people but it doesn't do me much good. I'm more or less certain I'm not winning any prizes in the chat section. You should have seen them all falling over each other to get et this new little 20 year old chatter. I work with too many sexists. This one guy keeps saying boys are such children. Mind you he's a giant flirt himself. They're all so much weinies.
I get 2 days off. I plan to barbeque and I got a mickey of southern comfort to watch the cat while the landlords are away camping. It's turning into another scorcher so I don't think I'll ne loving the weather but it won't kill me either so I think all in all I will enjoy it. I'm debating getting my new glasses this week or waiting til next week. I do need them but since I'm back to nights the eye strain has been so much less and the eye ache is all gone. I'm almost thinking I don't even need them, but I know I do. I do so wish I was more into living life but the heat makes me want to sleep and stay still and be all rich so I can get whatever stuff I want to. He he he, I seriously need some me time.
I need to get my roots done and have some drinks and some time to do my toe nails. I'd like to do a full petticure, but I'm too lazy to sit in the tub and soak my feet. I'm so boring :) I'm all excited about the impending room change and the removal of glass from my foot and the possible barbeque I'll be having on Saturday - because I can and I love to barbeque even if I make myself the queen of heat stroke doing so. It's the price I pay for being little old evil and selfish barbeque loving me. He he he.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 2:29 PM
18 July 2006
there's no way that i want you to be left behind
:
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ghost writer Ambrrrr at 6:36 AM
16 July 2006
senses working overtime
:
If you have never seen Identity. Go rent it now. I'm also drifting through Season 1 & 2 of Titus. Still? I know. I'm here to email in the top 10, the weird hours have been making me forget what day it is. Helping me recall is the 7 day strectch, which this is part one of the middle. The 'hump day' spans 3 days in my case. Day one ensued at 12.45 pm. Weird dreams and weird hours make me docile and the heat is wearing thin.
TOP TEN:
10) true faith - new order
9) he wasn't man enough - toni braxton
8) caught a lite sneeze - tori amos
7) halo - depeche mode
6) calling all angel - train
5) she makes me wanna die - tricky
4)
3) hands open - snow patrol
2) is it any wonder - keane
1) private conversation - lyle lovett
Private Conversation
And his hand it fell behind her
As his arm it reached around
And she looked at the window
And she watched the shade go down
It was a private conversation
No one heard her say
That the man she left behind her
Was two thousand miles away
Singing boy pick up that fiddle
And play that steel guitar
And find yourself a lady
And dance right where you are
There was a lonely girl from nowhere
With a smile all sweet with pain
And she never stopped to wonder
If she'd see him again
It was a private conversation
No one heard her say
That man that she was looking for
Was only twenty streets away
Singing boy pick up that fiddle
And play that steel guitar
And find yourself a lady
And dance right where you are
And the band it just kept playing
As she came walking in
And he never stopped to wonder
If he'd see her again
It was a private conversation
No one heard him say
That girl he left behind him
Was two thousand miles away
He just sang boy pick up that fiddle
And play that steel guitar
And find yourself a lady
And dance right where you are
And the moral of this story
Is I guess it's easier said than done
To look at what you've been through
And to see what you've become
It's a private conversation
No one hears you say
It's a private conversation
And his hand it fell behind her
As his arm it reached around
And she looked at the window
And she watched the shade go down
It was a private conversation
No one heard her say
It was a private conversation
No one heard him say
It was a private conversation
No one heard her say
It was a private conversation
Keep blogging.
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ghost writer Ambrrrr at 11:05 PM
14 July 2006
sweet smell of the mystery i recall
:
With a few days off and a total inability to sit in front of my computer due to the crushing heat here abouts - it looks kinda like I went MIA. Yesterday, while it was 91 degrees in the shade, we barbequed and had a lazy good time. Before that I ran out and jumped through hoops filing my official divorce request. Here I am 452 dollars later waiting for my little peice of paper that says 31 days from this date you are divorced. It now seems so easy. He he he.
After that hoop jumping I went off to get a new pair of glasses. I found a coolio pair that look a lot like the black ones I have now, only they are lined with zebra stripes on the inside. They have french hinges and so I can get a break from tearing out the hair that have been getting stuck in my regularily hinged glasses of late. Eventually I will be getting more contact lenses and possibly another pair of glasses and I have big dreams, big big dreams. Some of my dreams involve an Ikea platform bed. It's good to want things.
I've been having really weird dreams for a while and I still don't know why. I think the heat has an effect, but I don't think that it could possibly be the sole cause of the weirdness my mind holds. Too much staying up late, watching movies and reading books. Those things all jumble together and make for the freakiest shit you can see inside your head. Part of it is that I'm just not impressed with the whole working for a week straight before I get another day off. At least I get to find out what they're going to do to me schedule wise, today, considering the suckage of the last few weeks. 2.45 today, 4.45 tomorrow and 6 pm start times for the rest of the week. Ewww.
I'm going to get a lot of reading done because there's nothing good on time shift that late, I can't sleep when I get home right after work and I can't watch DVD's because I don't want to be rude and wake anyone up at 2.30. I almost seem like a swell person, but really the fans that need to be on to tame the infernal heat make it hard to hear the tv too, so I can't turn it up loud enought to understand without feeling guilty that I may be bothering someone's sleep. I'm weirdly wired that way.
So after feeding myself a bunch of steak and mushrooms and asparagus I went off to take some movies back and had Dairy Queen. I came back and watched the right player leave BB7 all stars. Then I started watching Titus season 1 and 2 and reading Ashes to Ashes by Tami Hoag. I like Titus, because it's a lot like how it was growing up in my house. I like the books because I don't have to hear them. I do blame the books for re activating my imagination and feeding into the weird dreams. It's a reach I know, but there are parts of my mind that just aren't on when I don't do any reading. I'm all good at having the imagination shut off, it makes me wonder way too much about everything and then there's the planning. I'm getting a new room soon. I'm planning how I think it should be and wondering exactly how everything is going to be. I'm just kinda excited about how there will bo only one noisy wall and not 2. I'll be far enought away from Kid M that I won't be able to hear him. Yeeha.
I've gotta go and get ready for work and such and pretend I'm not living in the Eastern Ontario version of an EZ Bake Oven. It's insane. It makes e wanna die, really. If the humidity would just fuck off I'd be fine, but no such luck.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 12:10 PM
10 July 2006
you'll learn to love it later
:
First I want to applogise to my BFFU. I'm assuming I didn't invite you to my wedding since you didn't answer me. Sorry, I really didn't invite many people. The only out of towner I invited was a girl who invited me to her wedding just for the present. I figured turn about was fair play. I think I knew deep in my heart that things weren't as fabulous as I wanted to pretend at that time and so I left out anyone who would have actually cared. Plus I think we were maybe not talking too much right then. We did have a little period where we lost touch. Thank god that changed.
It's really hot and sweaty these days and trying to sleep from 3-11 or 4-noon is hard, what with my mindless rommates and bass. Kid N's a little freaking trying to get me to sign my lease a month and a half early. He may be worried that he's going to be short a renter, though I have 0 plans to go anywhere. Sure my married friends are talking about getting a townhouse and I can have blah blah blah. I so know talk is cheap and suddenly I'm totally in the phase where I don't plan to move quickly on anything. I moved too fast earlier and it got me entangled with ahead up his ass type who thinks ignoring a problem makes it go away. In this case it made his free sex go away. I really need someone with stamina anyways. But I'm indifferent. I'm looking around and wondering but not seeking. I've done what I can to turn off the potential radar. Not interested in nothing too serious.
I am interested in another barbeque. I have Thursday off and I'm gonna rock the casbah if it doesn't rain. I plan on seeing Pirates of the Carribean Dead Man's Chest, cuz I loved the first one. I did find out the St Laurent cinemas, while low rent and kinda hokey - are 3 dollars a show and I so enjoyed Thank You For Smoking. I've never found Aaron Eckhardt that appealing, but in this movie he was golden. Katie Holmes sex scenes intact (mostly?), she was typically doe eyed and wooden. I'm not sure Suri exists, and given her inability to see report viper/sex kitten - Katies' lack of press maybe related to her lack of skill. Poor Tom Criuise, Scientology may be what started his career success (don't they all say that?) but it also appears to be what sunk his battle ship.
I keep going out to take pictures and not taking them. The weather is prohibitivem since I char in like an hour. I can't really go anywhere and wander around. I've thought about taking pictures from the bus, but the windows are usually filthy and then there's the movement factor. With a moving vehicle it's hard to say that pictures will be clear and capture what you want. In the mean time I'm so enjoying my new DVD burner and I have plans to finish my second book in as many weeks. I got stuck on this http://www.2jdhosting.com/ge/logogame/ last night. I got all but 7, we can do this together if you have any ideas. I didn't know the P, the coffee cup, the :-(, the green/silver orb, the T2, the weird B and the pink circle with 3 blue triangles. Any suggestions?
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 1:41 PM
06 July 2006
don't give up the game until your heart stops beating
:
I've mucked around a bit and realized the first day I had this up there was like no comments enabled. I fixed that. I haven't changed the name yet. Waiting for genius to strike me. I got my honoured guest. I'm not sure if that will change daily, weekly or ever. A million typos ago I asked for pictures submissions that I would post at the top. Now it's the corner. I'm trying to be more browser friendly but I've been here in IE and it still sux. Have a heart people get Firefox +> http://www.mozilla.com/firefox/
It's a hard shift back to evenings form days and it's only getting worse for next week I do 8.5 from 4.45 pm. Some mofo in where-ever-the-hell-istan that they do scheduling needs to be repeatedly beaten for that one. First of all there is NO 4.45 shift. Never ever has been. Now there is on just for me. Fuckers. Then my married friends are going away for that weekend and they want (well maybe it keeps changing and so I don't even know what the fuck anymore) me to watch their cats. I am so NOT walking to their place at 1.15 am. I'm so just barely able to agree to walk to my place at that time. There is a difference. If I scream here old people will be all what the hell and come looking. If I scream there they will be like, turn off the lights before the cops come for a statement. We have severely nosy neighbours. They have extremely rude neighbours.
It's going to be interesting because at first the possibility was billed as my vacation in the city. So far I don't have any of those days off and I don't really want to be going there at that late hour. I know I have to take care of the animals but geez louise did it turn out to be inconvenient. Now possibly their relative is coming and I won't be necessary. The story changes daily and I'm perplexed and bemused. It's not like losing out on watching a couple of cats and a/c is going to cause a mental breakdown in me. It seems that my friends feel I will be severely disappointed at the loss of this chore. Uh no, but I can't make them understand that it seems.
Aside from ironing out that, it's going to be an uneventful one day weekend this week. I saw Rockstar Supernova and Damn does Tommy Lee look rough. Of all those guys he looks like 20 miles of bad dirt road. EEK. The houseguests in BB7 get 'announced' and the first RSN peeps get flung off so I have things to tape and I have a new DVD burner to install and I have not energy or desire for any of it. I'll blame it on the grey day and the fact that I'm suffering reversal of jet lag. I'm off to be bumping along now.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 1:15 PM
04 July 2006
i'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun
:
I finally made it into the TTLB Ecosystem. Now if only more blogs would link to me I'd maybe get some appendages :)
Other than that nothing doing here. Saving $$, singing along, reveling in the return to afternoons. Ah the sweet joy of sleeping in and not having a constant eye migraine. It;s the small things I love.
Again I do almost have the new blog set up and ready to go. I can't promise greatness, I aspire but you know me. I'd like to say I may change the name of the blog, which could really throw me off the ecosystem again but then whatcha gonna do? I am nothing if not a foil, agent and seeker of change. It's a constant I like at least as much as I fear it. I maybe getting a new tattoo and I'm definitely going to be expanding my reading forte. Any good books to recommend?
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 6:43 PM
03 July 2006
in your room where souls disappear
:
I barely slept at all but I do know that Jerk Chicken wings and PC's Blue label chocolate gelato make everything alright. It's been a fast day. I've managed to survive on about 4 hours sleep and even catch the idol boys. I think there are a lot of good voices this time, but I think I'm tired of all the hopefully pathetic renditions of minor love-ish ballads. I'm with groucho Zach here, somebody please rock something.
I'm spending my time reading and trying to sleep. This helping friends out is great, now I'm just a day away from my beloved after noons and I'm so happily anticipating it I can't even begin to tell you how much. I'm pretty happy happy joy joy about the whole not getting up with the roosters and the sun thing. I'm such a night owl I'm not sure how I've managed to make it 10 days doing the before 7 am thing. I haven't gotten up that early consistently since I was in High school. Of course it's much easier for me to get up and get going when I have too. Back then it wall tiring me out.
I was in Future shop the other day and my greedy little materialistic, I have no life of my own heart, was coveting these DVD's something fierce. They had Titus and Buffy on major sale and then there was Civilization 3 for 10 bucks. I'm all so looking forward to going back and getting them. I was trying to get information on my new drug plan. It appears it's the same shit different carrier. However I did stumble across the fomulary that the entire freak show is based on and now I know what I can have for a prescription and how much it's going to cost me. In the meantime I had a run in with a half wit at the Walmart pharmacy. I wanted to strangle her and I would have but it would have been more trouble for me. Long story short I am never again using their pharmacy again. Too much trouble for me and little pay off for an out of the way place to get my prescriptions when I have a pharmacy across the street that isn't going to be a snotty bitch to me.
I'm getting excited about the idea of getting the glass outta my foot. I'll get bored with it soon enough. I have to work some freaky voodoo to get the time off because, apparently I work in the only place where there is no such thing as emergency leave. I'm not coming back for a couple of days because I say so, so we'd better be able to get it worked out. I do know now that my married friend has a stich phobia and if I have stiches and show here it will incite some kind of nervous breakdown. Not looking for it.
In the meantime I go forth to plot barbeque, tourisitng and read another book. I may actually take the Library challenge this year and get a library card. It's going to be interesting to say the least. My next big plans are glasses/contacts and the filing of my divorce application. Yeeha.
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 9:07 PM
02 July 2006
don't be a girl not for me
:
I've been on the run having fun and working 9-5 ish. 2 more days and I say hullo to the nights again and I really can't wait. I'm not a morning person. Try as I might I work best between 10-2am. Give or take. I'm watching Blade the tv series on Spike and I'm trying to think of a decen top 10. Aside from having way too much good food with good friends and barbequing myself into total bliss I've been too busy. Somewhere along the road I lost a 25 dollsr fill up on my cally and I'm kinda miffed but oh well.
The new layout is coming along and I figure by the end of next week I should have it up and running. Wish me luck. I haven't been intentionally ignoring my email but I'm too screwed up with work lately to keep up with anyone. I will email you about the pictures. I swear, just don't know when.
Mental Playlist
10) photograph - nickleback
9) silver springs - fleetwood mac
8) halo - depeche mode
7) save your scissors - city and clolour
6) my new tango shoes - bif naked
5) shoop - salt 'n peppa
4) liar - henry rollins band
3) apparitions - matthew good band
2) the scientist - coldplay
1) even the losers - tom petty and the heartbreakers
EVEN THE LOSERS
Well, it was nearly all summer we sat on your roof
Yeah, we smoked cigarettes and we stared at the moon
And I'd show you stars you never could see
Baby, it couldn't have been that easy to forget about me
Baby, time meant nothing, anything seemed real
Yeah, you could kiss like fire and you made me feel
Like every word you said was meant to be
No, it couldn't have been that easy to forget about me
Baby, even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers keep a little bit of pride
They get lucky sometimes
Two cars parked on the overpass,
Rocks hit the water like broken glass
I should have known right then it was too good to last
God, it's such a drag when you're livin' in the past
Baby, even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers keep a little bit of pride
They get lucky sometimes
Baby, even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers keep a little bit of pride
Yeah, they get lucky sometimes
Baby, even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers get lucky sometimes
Even the losers get lucky sometimes
Keep blogging.
ghost writer Ambrrrr at 10:27 PM
